In this blog, Claire Irving of Better Strategic Consultancy explores how it can be lonely in CEO positions and suggests ways to create the support structures to help you thrive.
One of the huge learning curves I experienced when I became a chief exec for the first time was the feeling of loneliness that came with the role. On one hand I had earned custodianship of the largest team I had ever led, but on the other hand the buck stopped with me. The role, with its responsibilities, decision making and accountability meant that I was alone. I didn’t want to voice this because as potentially the highest paid person in the organisation (who, let's not forget, had also applied for the job), I could imagine the teeny tiny violin played by my colleagues. And, did feeling like this mean I was ... doing it wrong?
Without being too binary, for a collaborative, broadly extrovert old bean like me loneliness at work can be a challenge. I need to boost my social battery and test and share thoughts. For my introvert cousins, I imagine the temptation is to retain their social battery charge by seeking space and time far from the madding crowd. Both archetypes risk cheesing everyone off by either getting in the way of the work and inadvertently setting hares running or by perhaps appearing disengaged and distant.
I know it isn’t just me who has experienced these feelings and I wanted to share some of things I've learned along the way. Hopefully they will be a help to you on your journey
1. Work to know yourself and take responsibility for how you feel
Notice when you feel lonely: is there a pattern or cause for it that you can identify? Is there a way for you to plan work to avoid it in future? If you know that tough decisions around budgeting time increase loneliness for you, plan welcome breaks and boosts for yourself. Get out and see your team in action.
Take breaks: schedule time for the things that relax and rejuvenate you. Model this to your team and they will be very grateful.
Consider coaching or mentoring: exploring your skills, behaviours as a leader and learning from others can help build your resilience and ensure you’re leading from the best starting point.
2. Build connections and relationships
Get to know your people: and make yourself available. Walk the floor, shadow, sit in on team meetings. Be interested and authentic. Listen. This will help create opportunities for brilliant working but also mean you can have the occasional nice moment with a colleague while making tea (Yorkshire, obv.)
Seek genuine connections: Look beyond your immediate professional network and foster relationships with like-minded leaders and also leaders who don’t think in the same way as you.
Join professional organisations: These groups offer opportunities for networking and support.
3. Own and develop the culture
Lead by example: Listen. Be authentic. Demonstrate empathy, appropriate vulnerability, and a commitment to fostering a positive work environment – and then make sure it’s done. Building trust and evidencing your commitment to any change will give people security.
Encourage and practice open two-way communication where people feel safe: It is within your gift to create an environment where your people feel comfortable, heard and able to share their concerns and their ideas and innovations.
At Better, we’ve been there. We walked the path of leadership and can support you to grow and develop. We offer paid mentoring for leaders helping you achieve more for your organisation and for yourself. Get in touch if you want to find out more.
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